I AM DEVOTEE by Sweet Angel

I am sure you are familiar with the story of the ugly duckling. Who wouldn’t be fascinated when the ugly duckling transforms into the gorgeous swan.

But did you ever think of what it would have been like if that ugly duckling grew up to be simply: an ugly duck?

Hi. Meet me. AKA the ugly duck.

 

I have always known I was different than all the other girls. I was plain. Plain in appearance and in character. Not the most interesting. Or interesting at all. Rather boring actually. Very few friends. Acquaintances really. I couldn’t blame them. Who’d want to hang out with me anyway.

But the worst thing ever was being invisible. People never seemed to notice me. Maybe they ignored me on purpose or really didn’t see me. Whatever it was, I remained invisible.

Do they know that every smile hides a million tears? What if they did? No one cared.

 

Then, one day I dreamed of you.

I was so young. I must have been 4 or 5 years old at the time. And I dreamed of you. I saw your amazing eyes looking at me, calling out to me and extending your arms to me.

I woke up looking for you but you weren’t there. I think this is when it all started.

You started visiting me more and more often .. in my dreams. Your face became so familiar now.

At first you were just my friend. We played together and you shared my lonely existence. You didn’t make fun of me, or avoid me. You could see me. You became my best friend. But the strangest thing was that you were always sitting in a strange looking chair with shiny metal wheels. You were fascinating.

 

I grew up. You grew up too.

Other girls started dating.

Me? Still invisible thank you. But no. I had you.

I loved going to bed early. See, in my dreams you were with me. You came everyday. And you became my knight in shining wheels

 

I realized I couldn’t spend my life sleeping. And so I started looking around me

Maybe, just maybe you will be there too.

Is this a wheelchair there? Is the guy in it you? You who filled every part of me?

 

The days passed. Years passed too. And I grew older. Then grew old. And still I couldn’t find you.

 

One day, one boring lonely day, I saw a face. A face so familiar to me that it aches to see it.

It is you. Yes you. With your beautiful smile, loving heart and gorgeous body.

Will you know me? Will you know how long I have been waiting for you?

I want you to hold me to make up for a thousand lonely years.  I want you to love me to make up for a thousand broken dreams.

I want your beautiful hands around me.  

I want to spend an eternity just looking in those eyes.

But will you believe me when I say you are amazing in every way?

Or will you wonder how I can love you, with a body like yours?

Will you believe you were the only thing that kept me going all this time?

Will you?

If you don’t see me, like everyone else, I think this will be the end of me.  I know there isn’t much in me to like.. but can I hope? Can I dream?

 

I am yours indefinitely.

I am your devotee.

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